archersangel: (you are here)
[personal profile] archersangel
there's this thing going around tumblr lately about how weird/strange/scary we humans might seem to aliens species. now there is a whole tumblr dedicated to that idea [tumblr.com profile] humans-are-seriously-weird. it got me to thinking about weird stuff we humans do.

food.
we eat the craziest things; hot peppers, things fried in fat, poison fish, fish that has been left to rot for a long time, fungus & berries that grow in thorny bushes. we eat things in weird combinations that gross out some people and fascinate others.
some people are very picky about what they eat. some won't eat foods with certain textures, or will only eat foods of a certain color. the aliens understand food allergies, or rather allergies in general (some species refuse to land in any country where it's currently pollen season.)

fun
that things that we do for fun or recreation would confuse most aliens; racing motor vehicles of various kids around at high speeds, running, swimming or riding a bike over long distances & sometimes rough terrain. we shoot projectile weapons at targets. some humans jump out of perfectly good flying machines with nothing more than (what looks to the aliens) like a large bed sheet to slow them down before they hit the ground.
others jump off of bridges with a giant elastic band attached to their ankles. still others walk along a wire high off of the ground & some didn't think that was challenging enough, so they made a line that goes slack when you walk on it and put that high up. bad enough it's slack, but people jump & flip on it too.

pranks
aliens just don't get it. why in the name of everything that is decent & holy in this galaxy would you put hot sauce in someone's milkshake or in their shampoo? or fill their 4-wheeled motor vehicle with golf-balls? or put a bucket of water over a door so it pours down on someone's head? or convince them they won a a multi-million dollar lottery when they didn't?
the human committee that's in charge of alien/human relations prays daily that one of these idiots won't get the idea to put a whoopee cushion on the leader of the alien exploratory teams' chair or replaces their cup with a dribble one & creates an interstellar incident.

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